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Fatale Media Newsletter May 2005 |
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In This Issue:
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Dominatrix Waitrix
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Dear Friend,
We’re pleased to announce a new lesbian DVD from Fatale. For anyone who’s ever been a waitress or worked in a restaurant, Dominatrix Waitrix is a real trip. Ah, revenge is sweet...and sexy!
Funny, saucy—did we say sexy?—Dominatrix Waitrix is the brainchild of Chicago cinematographer Edith Edit, a dazzling pornographer who’s got a keen eye for the perverse.
The flick is queer, no question about it, with dashes of BDSM, sci-fi and musical theater thrown in. Just the right ingredients for a sex romp like none we’ve ever seen. Yes, there’s group sex, dildo sex, finger-fucking...plus role-playing and even a knife scene that will make you squirm and get wet real fast. We sure did.
The film festivals have been eating this up. Edith just returned from the London Gay and Lesbian Film Festival, where Dominatrix Waitrix got a rave ovation from the audience. If you’re planning ahead, it’ll be featured at Outfest this coming July in Los Angeles.
The Chicago Reader wrote after a Chicago screening, “The tale of a sexually voracious, leather-clad human clone who takes over the bodies of overworked waiters and preys on their customers...A stylish, quirky mix of erotica and rage.”
So how does “rage” mesh with “funny”? Well, we think that if you’ve ever worked in the service industry, or in a corporation, or watched The Office on TV, you understand how rage and humor go hand in hand. Edith Edit has added major doses of sex to the mix, and you know that’s a recipe we just had to gobble up.
Dominatrix Waitrix will ship next week, and you can pre-order now.
On another note, many of you have requested the free Fatale catalogue. Please know that the new one is at the graphic designer’s now and scheduled to print within the month. We’re saving all the requests till the new one comes out. Thank you for your patience.
Yours in good sex and love,
Nan & Christi
nan@fatalemedia.com
christi@fatalemedia.com
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As we troll around the forums and blogs about lesbian sex, we’ve noticed that some lesbians don’t like to play with toys—strap-ons, butt plugs, nipple clamps and the like.
But sometimes, it helps to have a little something to get going when you’re making love. We have a trusty Prelude at the ready (usually for Christi), a long-time friend who’s there no matter what.
Is a vibrator considered a toy? Maybe, maybe not. Dressing up for a party can get you in the mood, even if you’d rather stay home. So too a vibrator can get you in the mood for sex, even if you didn’t think you were. Once you’re in the mood and things are swinging, you can feel free to forget about the vibrator.
And a vibrator is always nice to have around when your honey’s out of town or not there when you want her to be.
Vibrators are great to have along on business trips. We put a call into the U.S. Department of Homeland Security’s Transportation Security Administration to double-check the status of vibrators on flights originating in the U.S.
Are vibrators permitted in your carry-on and checked luggage? We figured if they allow Toy Transformer Robots in both carry-on and checked luggage, vibrators should be okay too.
Deirdre O’Sullivan of the TSA clarified the matter for us. Since vibrators are “neither weapons nor explosives,” they’re fine to bring in your carry-on and/or checked luggage. She offered this pertinent suggestion, though: “In order to reduce the embarrassment factor, you might want to take the batteries out of the device.”
It’s fine to carry them on along with the vibrator itself, but what happens, according to Deirdre, is that sometimes they start vibrating. “Sometimes we get vibrating bags, and we have to determine why they’re vibrating. The same thing happens with battery-powered shavers.”
So that’s the word from Washington. Take the batteries out. Otherwise, your vibrators are a-okay on airplanes, in carry-on and checked luggage.
Vibrators come in all shapes and sizes. What’s the best way to choose? Word-of-mouth referrals are always good, but different strokes for different folks. You may like a big round head against your clit. Other women prefer the sizzle of a smaller vibrating head—they’re easy to manipulate, that’s for sure.
We know one woman who carries a small, battery-operated vibrator in her purse...just in case she’s stuck in a waiting room somewhere. Off to the ladies’ room for a little buzz and she’s happy to wait for the rest of the afternoon!
In general, though, corded vibrators have a longer and more reliable life. Just remember you’ll need to be near an outlet to plug it in before you can use it.
If budget is no problem, experiment. But a larger vibrator and one with a smaller head on it. Throw in a battery-operated vibrator, especially if you travel a lot or find it difficult—like our friend does—to wait around for appointments and clients.
The inimitable Carol Queen put out a video a few years back called Carol Queen’s Great Vibrations: An Explicit Consumer’s Guide to Vibrators.
This is a great place to start if you’re really unsure or want an experienced guide. Carol demonstrates two dozen vibrators—and discusses how they work, what each vibrator is good for and the differences between vibrators.
E-mail your tips and tricks to christi@fatalemedia.com. You could be published here!
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Many of you know g-spot expert Deborah Sundahl as Fanny Fatale. In “Ask Fanny,” an exclusive column created just for this newsletter, she answers your questions about female ejaculation and the G-spot.
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Hi, Fanny,
It is Lisa again (Lis). I haven't had any sex with my partner yet. I am just practicing for him before we meet. Our relationship is a long-distance romance.
Anyway, after stimulating my G-spot, I did get wet (lubricant)...then got the urge to pee. What do I need to do? Push it out? How? With my hips being raised or push out my PC muscle? I tried both of them. And I believe that I really did ejaculate...my entire towel was so wet. It was not creamy...it was just liquidy. I did what you suggested...to taste the liquid before going to the bathroom...to see the difference. There was a definite difference.
I also need to know how to have an ejaculation with an orgasm. I have been practicing just to ejaculate without an orgasm. I also tried to ejaculate with orgasm. It scared me...that I could not move for a while and my uterus/vagina/tummy went bang! ...meaning that I had a huge orgasm. I was amazed and wanted to do that again, but it would not come back right after I had that amazing orgasm. Why is that?
Once I am with my love, how do I help him to stimulate my G-spot? And how not to be so uncomfortable. I have been without a man for four years. I am not scared, but I am very, very anxious to please him and very eager to have a great sex with him.
Lis
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Dear Lis,
Thanks for writing again and answering my questions. I like to hear that women are taking my book seriously and practicing before they are with their honeys. Why? Because you are getting to know your body, how it works and how you like it to be touched. You’ll be able to communicate with him so much easier with this practical know-how under your belt.
Let me go through your questions top to bottom. So, we have determined that you arouse yourself and get wet in the traditional sense: vaginal lubrication. Then, because you are obviously stimulating your G-spot correctly and successfully, you are getting that urge to pee - which is ejaculation knocking at the door and wanting to come out! You need to push it out using your PC muscles. If your hips rise up or you want to squat is less important than using your PC muscles. However, you may find different positions easier to successfully push out the ejaculate, so if you don’t manage to do so the first time or two, don’t despair. Just try another position. Perhaps standing over the kitchen counter, slightly bent forward, is a third possible option.
You believe you really did ejaculate, and even did the bathroom test by taking a white tissue and noticing how the ejaculate has no color or smell, whereas your urine will make the tissue slightly yellow and it will smell like pee. CONGRATULATIONS, you are ejaculating! Many women who ejaculate just can’t quite believe they are doing it, and you, dear Lis, appear to be one of them! YOU DID IT! And you’ll do it more and more frequently and easily from now on, so please, no worries! You can relax about that now.
It’s unclear if you ejaculated with your wonderful orgasm. If you did, girl, you’ve got it down now! If you did not, then let me say something about the orgasm you had. Because the G-spot has a different nerve than the clitoris, it has a different orgasmic sensation. So, what you had was a true G-spot orgasm. The G-spot orgasm does involve more than just the genitals; your tummy, uterus, vagina all got involved, and it’s only a scary feeling because it was a new one. You can even feel the G-spot orgasm in your legs, toes, arms and head, too! (That will come in time, as you get more used to this “full-body” type of orgasm that is the G-spot’s natural sensation.) It can be so drenching, so satisfying that yes, you can’t just “bring it back” like you can a clitoral orgasm. Sometimes, the feeling is so fully satiating that it’s a few days before you feel like sex again.
Ejaculating with a G-spot orgasm will come in time if it hasn’t already. Some women cannot ejaculate with something in their vagina, so make sure you push whatever is in your vagina - toy or penis - out when you orgasm. You may be able to push slightly just as you are almost to the top of the “wave” of orgasm - just before the orgasm “breaks.” It’s a tricky bit of timing for some women, but with practice you’ll get the hang of it. The most important thing is always have patience! Never pressure yourself, as that can shut ejaculation down. Only be happy with what you DID accomplish, and have faith it will just keep getting better, which believe me, it will.
I don’t blame you for wanting to have great sex with your new honey! What you are opening up in yourself sexually via your G-spot’s awakening is a very deep, feminine need to merge, feel sexual abandon and have drenching sexual satisfaction on both a physical and emotional level! Oh, I do hope he is able to meet you in that way! I suggest you tell him about your discoveries over dinner.
Warm him up to all this important information, but make it playful and sexy as you talk—in other words, flirtatious. Make sure you tell him that because your G-spot is becoming more sensitive, you are able to feel him inside you easily, and if he enters before you are ready or too roughly, it can shut down that sensitivity, and your arousal will be spoiled.
So, show him where your G-spot is by taking his finger and drawing it across your G-spot to arouse yourself, as you would your own finger or a sex toy. Tell him he can do the same motion with his penis; it’s not about plunging deeply or fast... that will come after you’ve had your first orgasm and ejaculated. Then, you will want him to plunge madly into you, like you can’t get enough of him, and you will ejaculate many times; not necessarily with another orgasm, but with desire and feelings so intense, it will feel fantastic. If your first true G-spot orgasm was scary, wait till you experience this part! LOL. As for your partner, once he gets over the wonderful shock of it all, he’ll be anxious to have that again and again.
Above all, Lis, remember these are new skills for both you and him, and that takes time to develop. Also, you are new lovers, and you MUST realize that the first time is not always so great, but will get better each time you make love. If he realizes that, too, and if he can talk openly with you and not shy away from listening to your new discoveries, then you two have an excellent chance at having some beautiful fountainous lovemaking happen. If he is too shy or can’t communicate, it won’t be a two-way street and that will never be fully satisfying to you. I understand you are anxious to please, but try to hold back a little and make sure he is the kind of guy who is just as anxious to learn about you, your body and to please you! You deserve nothing less.
Fanny
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Send your questions to askfanny@fatalemedia.com.
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In each issue of Fatale News, we want to hear your ideas, opinions, comments.
In the April 2005 Anal Sex Poll, most of you said you had tried anal sex and loved it (127 votes), followed closely by those of you who haven’t yet tried it but want to (23 votes). Votes totaled 203 as of this writing.
To see the complete, final poll results, check out this page.
The new poll was inspired by Lydia, who’s been writing to us about butch/butch sex.
Tell us: At this very moment, if you could only watch one kind of sex movie, which type would you choose?
This poll is completely anonymous. It’s on Fatale’s home page.
We’ll give you the results in the June 2005 Fatale Media Newsletter.
Here are some comments about the anal sex poll and other good words:
Mr. Seven wrote via e-mail:
“Yes, there are many fine fellows who have felt their ladyfair’s lustful finger up the butthole in a moment of passionate play and pleasure...sheer ecstasy....As long as Mistress obeys the rules of slow as you go, and KY lotion is a good way to start. Plus, a clean set of fingers is a good way to travel. Remember 7th grade Hygiene class. As for all you guys out there who think this is gay talk...be honest with yourselves. You've been there on at least one or twice... Keep it real. Anal sex is still considered romance--foreplay, after play and trust. In respect to all forms of sexual activities, the key to it all involves kindness and love.”
Well said, Mr. Seven! We couldn’t agree more.
Kelly wrote via e-mail:
“Not really a suggestion, just a thank you.
You folks rock with your info and special offers and making sure we all have access to good ole lesbian content in our porn ;o) Keep it up! ...so to speak...”
Thanks, Kelly!
Sam wrote from Australia:
“Hi to all the lovely sexy girls at Fatale Media. I like to see more new DVD or VHS from you. I like to see threeways or more in colour and no music and just hot dirty talking.... Can you make the DVD or VHS go for bit longer, maybe a 1 1/2 hours or more? Keep the good work going.”
Thanks, Sam. Check out Dominatrix Waitrix, Fatale’s new lesbian DVD due out May 12.
Keep those cards and letters coming, and celebrate sex!
Nan and Christi
www.fatalemedia.com
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