Posts Tagged ‘dating advice’

Tongue-Tied? Flirting, Talking Dirty and More

Wednesday, October 3rd, 2012

Everybody gets tongue-tied now and then, picking up girls, e-mailing potential dates from online personals, approaching somebody on the street or in school or at work.

Be yourself, everybody says.

But what if you don’t know who you are, or who you want to be with this particular person? What if you want to explore something different?

Even couples who have been together for a while might want to break out of routine and try something new.

In Hope Springs, Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones star as a long-term couple who explore adding spark to their marriage.

When asked by the Philippine Daily Inquirer about why passion and sexuality “continue to be subjects that are not so openly discussed,” Streep said, “That has something to do with our vulnerability in talking about sex. We’re talking about our most vulnerable self, our needs, insecurities and nakedness, literally. But we’re also talking about our emotional needs, what we yearn for and what we never stop hoping for.”

Going out on sexier dates means learning to get over being tongue-tied. Being sexier means learning to flirt and even to talk dirty. It means being vulnerable.

In Talk to Me Baby: A Lover’s Guide to Dirty Talk and Role Play director and host Shar Rednour recommends role play for couples who want to explore “something different.”

We think role-play is a perfect way to be vulnerable and protected at the same time. But you have to ask for it. To get up the courage and say, “Want to talk dirty? Want to play dress-up?”

It’s the perfect time of year (think Halloween) to try dressing up and role-playing. There’s not much to lose in toying with new personalities, new personas, reaching inside to grab whatever you yearn for.

You can sound sexy and suggestive, flirty; you can free that sexy creature inside you.

Yours in good love and sex,

Nan & Christi

nan@fatalemedia.com

christi@fatalemedia.com

P.S. SMUT Magazine wrote about Talk to Me Baby: A Lover’s Guide to Dirty Talk and Role Play: “Shar Rednour is, as always, the perfect hostess. She’s her usual vampy, campy and out of control self. What I love about this video is that anyone can get something out of it.”

P.P.S. Check out what LesbianLife.About.com calls “the best lesbian porn.”

7 Tips for How to Talk to Her

Tuesday, October 2nd, 2012

When it comes right down to talking, and talking sexy, to a potential new girlfriend, try these seven tips:

1. Think flirting. Don’t push the “I’m so sexy” persona unless you want to risk turning her off. Keep it light.

2. Ask about her, then listen. What does she like to do when she goes out? What’s the sexiest party she ever went to? When you get to know her better, ask her if she’s ever thought about role-playing, or if she likes to talk dirty in bed.

3. Eavesdrop, then pick up on her conversations. If you overhear her talking to her girlfriends or other friends (and this applies to her Facebook and Twitter postings too, for assessing her interests), pick up on what she’s saying, and how she’s saying it. Is she cooing away about a new pair of high heels? You know enough to ask which new style she likes best.

4. Timing makes a difference. You can eavesdrop, but don’t bust in on her conversations. Wait till there’s an opening, then talk to her.

5. Don’t ignore her friends. If you’re in a public or even semi-private place, include her friends in the conversation. Even if you’ve only got eyes for her, how you treat her friends reflects on your character.

6. Tongue-tied? Admit it. Say, “I’m usually kind of shy,” then ask to buy her a drink or coffee. As long as your timing is good, most people won’t say no.

7. Want to talk dirty? Tell her she’s sexy, and tell her exactly what you want to do with her once you’re in bed.

There are lots of ways to talk to women, and to engage them socially. Getting up the nerve is the hard part. Talking comes naturally once you relax. Flirting with her opens you up to talking dirty in bed and on the phone.

We owe a nod of thanks to Nick Savoy’s Love Systems for ideas that informed this article.

Read more about Talk to Me Baby.

See all Fatale Media’s sexy videos.