G-spot expert Deborah Sundahl, a.k.a. Fanny Fatale, answers your questions about female ejaculation and the g-spot.
Dear Fanny,
I am 20 years old and have a girlfriend, but I can’t orgasm. She has been really good at helping me try, but I still can’t. I don’t like doing it myself either; it just doesn’t feel good. I wish I could have an orgasm, but I don’t know what to do and feel I should reach out for some help now.
Renee
Dallas, TX
Dear Renee,
I suggest that you make a concerted effort to have your orgasm by yourself first, and give your partner a rest. It is hard on the relationship and a lot of work for the partner, without the reward or pleasure. Better to keep your relationship free of a hard burden that is mostly your affair anyway.
What to do? You can start with these three things:
1. Read this wonderful book on how to have an orgasm. Becoming Orgasmic by Julia Heiman and Joseph LoPiccolo–here’s the Powell’s Books link–takes you step by step through the elements of female orgasm and guides you to fitting sexuality into other areas of your life.
2. Check out this new video, Betty Dodson’s Body Sex Workshop.
Betty Dodson is called the Mother of Masturbation because since the 1960s, she has been teaching women how to have an orgasm. Back then, very few woman had orgasms, and it was a feminist mission to change that sad fact. Now 83 years old, she is still going strong! Aided by her younger business partner, Carlin Ross, they just finished another video of Betty’s famous workshop teaching women to ejaculate. Enjoy and learn!
3. Lastly, ask yourself what is it about touching your body that bothers you? Breath and relax into the touch. Notice what keeps you from relaxing into the touch. Be very aware of what crosses your mind, or what images comes up. This is your issue. Take this and work with it, either through simple awareness that this is the problem, or perhaps the help of a therapist. But first, read the book and watch the video!
Pleasure will be yours! Give yourself time and permission, that’s all.
Fanny
P.S. Check out Female Ejaculation the Workshop by Deborah Sundahl.
Watch three gorgeous women learn to stimulate the G-spot and achieve beautiful orgasms in a workshop setting.
Bushy
Tuesday, May 24th, 2011Our dear friend Tony wrote to us with some more insights into the oftentimes mysterious world of straight kinky relationships.
We’ve known Tony for years, and he has shared his perspectives on sex and politics and the geopolitical shifts that allow our worlds to intersect. In another place and time, our worlds would probably have never met.
But that’s the fun thing about what we do! We meet people from all over the world and from all walks of life. This business offers a wonderful place for intersections.
Our friend’s latest letter was edited slightly to avoid the e-mail censors; this is his original letter to us:
“I would like to see posting the issue of pubic hair. As I told you before, my four girls have bushy pubic hair, which gives me a great sexual appetite for a good fuck.
“I did some surveying here [in Massachusetts], asking many women if they shave or keep growing their cunt hair and why? The women who shave believe that it will be easy for them to masturbate and to be licked from both sexes.
“The other women keep growing their pubic hair, because while masturbating they love to feel the hair and touch it, especially this excites them while they are taking a shower, see the shampoo on their pubic hair, as they believe this makes them feel that their privates are special, different from others’. When it comes to sex, they get more orgasm feeling, from the tongue on their pubic hair and the dick.
“As for me I adore the pubic hair to be bushy, because once my girls finish peeing on my face and in my mouth, I suck dry their pubic hair, while doing that my girls and me, we get extreme sexual excitement.”
Yours in good love and sex,
Nan & Christi
nan@fatalemedia.com
christi@fatalemedia.com
P.P.S. To read the letter that preceded this one, see “Advice on a Sexual Issue (Drinking Pee).”
Tags:Masturbation, peeing, pubic hair
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