No, we’re not talking about your lover! But your butt, your behind, your bum, your rear, your tush.
Enjoying anal penetration comes naturally to some people. They “get it.” They just naturally relax and enjoy without a care in the world.
But anal sex doesn’t come easy for everybody. There is the taboo of touching, let alone probing, the anus. It’s a private place, to be sure, which makes it hard for some men and women to allow entry.
When Fatale released Bend Over Boyfriend ten years ago – yes, it’s the 10th anniversary of Bend Over Boyfriend, a cause for celebration – Carol Queen and her lover Robert Morgan showed how role reversal can spice up your sex life.
Women, too, can be skittish when it comes to their boyfriends touching or penetrating their rear ends.
When you’re ready to open up and enjoy this delicious sex act, there are some steps you can take to make anal sex a real pleasure:
- —Wash up before you begin any lovemaking. Make sure nothing hurts or is sore down there. If you ever see blood in your stool or coming from your anus, tell your doctor right away.
- –Find pleasure in the familiar. Make love the way you always do. Treat your sweetie with kisses and caresses and find your comfort zone. Have as many orgasms as you like.
- –Touch yourself first. Do you feel happy? Talk to your lover. Do you want to feel your partner’s gentle touch? Tell him or her exactly what the touch feels like.
- –Remind yourself: Nobody’s going to hurt you. This is not about pain. This is about pleasure and exploring new sexual territory.
- –Stop there. Wait for next time to go any further.
- –Next time, repeat the process all over again. Only this time, using some water-based lubricant, allow your lover’s finger to come inside just a little bit.
- –Stop there. Wait until next time to go any further. You can even take a break and wait a couple more times before you try a small dildo, with a condom and lots of lube, of course.
And if your partner is the one who is struggling with anal sex, go slow, be gentle, restrain yourself until your partner feels confident to take it to the next level.
Ultimately, learning to enjoy anal penetration is about trust. You must trust each other for there to be true pleasure associated with anal sex. Or, we would argue, any other kind of sex.
Check out Bend Over Boyfriend for more tips on how to enjoy anal sex.
Celebrate Coming Out
Wednesday, October 1st, 2008Clay Aiken and Lindsay Lohan have finally come out publicly. And, it appears, on their own terms.
Even the New York Times’ Style section got in on the act on Sunday with “Out in Hollywood.” Nice pic, Ellen!
As one commenter noted in response to The Advocate’s article “Clay and Lindsay are Gay — Shock!”: “[O]ne should be allowed to self-identify. No one has the right to make that announcement for anyone else.”
We couldn’t agree more. All those queers still in the closet have a right to be there, just as each of us has a right to come out if and when we want to. We do understand that coming out is a luxury for those not living in tolerant circumstances. Hollywood is tolerant place.
“There are many who are not marriage material and are doing things to impress others,” he continued. “There are those who try to impress family members and friends.”
October 11, 2008, is National Coming Out Day here in the U.S.
Our friend Chris told Nan he wanted to wear her Take Her Down production T-shirt on that day! We’ll see if we can dig a clean one up for him.
However you celebrate National Coming Out Day, it’s worth remembering that those who don’t come out, who you just know are gay, probably have a reason for staying the closet.
We salute Hollywood stars and ordinary people alike for their courage in coming out.
Yours in good love and sex,
Nan & Christi
nan@fatalemedia.com
christi@fatalemedia.com
P.S. You can pay securely at Fatale by credit card or with PayPal. And remember, you get free shipping when you order 3 or more DVDs. See all Fatale’s DVDs.
P.P.S. Highly recommended and Fatale’s top-seller for September, The Crash Pad Series Volume 2.
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