A friend has been dating a woman for a few months. They took a long trip to China together, they’ve dated, and he has done everything “right.”
Lo and behold, a sad e-mail arrived the other day: “Our union is off.”
Union? What union? Were they thinking of getting married? Already?
Women need time. For as long as we’ve been lesbians (forever), this is one thing we know for certain.
A few months of dinners and movies and taking a trip, even a long one to China, is not enough time for her to feel secure in marriage.
But, you say, what about shotgun weddings? All those couples who get married right out of high school? All those women who get pregnant and marry in order to give their children a stable home?
We won’t deny that sometimes things move fast. But moving fast is not ideal.
Just as men don’t need nearly as much time in bed in order to orgasm, so too, in bed, most women need more time than men in order to orgasm.
Sure women can fake orgasms. Remember that scene in When Harry Met Sally?
But we women don’t want to fake orgasms. Women want real orgasms and real relationships and real romance.
Fanny Fatale has written extensively on men’s lovemaking habits in order to help them stimulate the g-spot and allow their lovers to ejaculate.
When we were watching The Crash Pad Series Volume 2: Unlocked, women take all the time they want in order to orgasm. Their partners indulge them and give them whatever they need or want. Why rush?
As in lovemaking, men need to go slow with women. Women need to go slow with women. That’s what romance is all about.
Is our take on all this one big generalization? Yes. Are there wide swaths of truth here? You tell us.
Praying Away the Gay?
Monday, September 15th, 2008Can you pray away the gay?
We’ve been asking some friends this question – not exactly a Gallop Poll-like sampling of individuals, but a mix nonetheless. Practicing Christians. Vietnam Vets. Southern-born ladies. Post Office workers. Just asking the people we’ve run into lately.
“Can you pray away psoriasis?” asked the Vet.
If you haven’t heard, the U.S. Vice Presidential nominee for the Republican Party this year is a woman named Sarah Palin. She worships at a church in Alaska and was taped giving a talk in which she referred to this “pray-away-the-gay” movement.
News to us. But, being gay, probably we wouldn’t have been their target audience. Intractable queers we are.
Still, when we think about it, there are at least two family members who we suspect have secretly prayed not to be gay. They both, if appearances bear out the truth, have succeeded at least in quashing their outward homo behavior.
But most of us know that praying not to be gay is laughable. It just doesn’t work!
Isn’t it possible that gays and lesbians were meant to add a little spice to an otherwise kind of boring evolutionary job?
Yours in good love and sex,
Nan & Christi
nan@fatalemedia.com
christi@fatalemedia.com
Posted in Lesbian Life, Sex Commentary | 7 Comments »